1. Telling your counterpart that they are wrong.
Informing someone that they are incorrect and that you happen to be right will definitely lead to them having to defend their integrity. After all, they will have to lose face to agree with you once you have advised them for being wrong.
If you think that your counterpart does not fully grasp your argument, deploy a basic negotiation skills method by asking several open questions. Try to ask questions that will help you to understand what can be found behind their opposing view. Try to recognize and recommend entirely independent criteria to serve as benchmarks for your negotiations.
2. Responding defensively by means of justifying yourself or your argument.
If your argument is being attacked by your counterpart it is not going to do much good to justify yourself. A defensive reaction by you may ensure that the negotiation turns into a positional exchange. If you feel that you are being personally attacked, try to take a short break and push things back to the timetable.
Appropriate communication skills teach us to resist the temptation to become emotional. It will be when you become emotional that you may possibly state issues that you will later regret. The best way to handle being attacked is to deflect the attack by remaining dedicated to the timetable & the desired outcome.
It is also advisable to make sure that you always have alternatives accessible to reaching settlement. When you have attractive alternatives available to you then you can end discussions at any time.
3. Not consciously controlling the frame of the discussion.
Don't let your counterpart take sole demand of the frame of the negotiation unless it is your intent to be 100% obliging. Obviously, for those who have not prepared for your negotiation, then it will be very difficult for you to control the frame of the discussions.
Make sure that you frame the negotiation in terms of the targets and aspirations that you would like to achieve because of the negotiation. If the counterpart takes control of the frame you can always attempt to re-frame the conversation to include your requirements, desires & goals.
Remember that you will save yourself considerable time & money by properly preparing for your discussions. You should prepare for at least as long as you expect to be negotiating and if you are still not able to apply these skills, it is best you invest in some effective negotiation training.
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